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I gave myself permission to change and it liberated me

By on May 12, 2016 in Attitude, behavior, Blog | 0 comments

Something I’ve always been good at is bashing my head against a wall (metaphorically) when it comes to trying to do something. I can be very stubborn, to the point that it becomes a detriment because I’m feeling frustrated, but still trying to make something happen, when it isn’t happening. Not too surprisingly I also see this same behavior in a lot of other business owners, because let’s face it we own a business in part because we want to be in control. However, sometimes we need to give ourselves permission to change from what we’re doing now to something more effective. Recently I was feeling this way yet again with my attempts to launch a couple of classes. I had learned a new way to launch the classes and I’d done everything the way I’d learned it, but it wasn’t working. And it was very frustrating, because the person I learned from seemed to pull if off effortlessly, but for me it just wasn’t coming together and I couldn’t figure out what it was I wasn’t doing that the other person was doing. I was bashing my head against the wall and getting no where fast. But the second time I tried the launch approach I learned, instead of continuing to force myself to do it, when I was getting the same results as before, I stopped myself. The whole point of making the changes I’ve made in my businesses was to avoid situations like this, where I wasn’t getting anywhere and yet I was right back at it. So I did something different… I gave myself permission to step back and change what I was doing, because it wasn’t working. Instead of continuing to force myself to do an activity that was just resulting in frustration, I stopped and I looked at everything else I was doing as well and asked myself if I was enjoying what I was doing or if it was feeling like a grind. The answer it was feeling like a grind, especially because I wasn’t getting the results wanted. Now the truth is that sometimes in business you have to stick it out and do some hard work that isn’t fun or...

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What I wish I knew about Networking when I first started my Business

By on Apr 7, 2016 in Blog, networking | 4 comments

When I was still in the coaching program to get my certification, I remember the instructor talking to us about networking. She told us that if we joined a networking group we needed to commit to the networking group. We needed to show up and be present and make sure people got to know us. It was good advice and I took it to heart, but in retrospect I must admit there are a few other things I wish I’d known about networking when I started Imagine Your Reality. Networking isn’t a substitute for sales. So often what I’ve seen in networking groups (and I’ve been guilty of it as well) is people trying their damnedest to avoid sales by networking. The problem with that approach is that you will avoid sales, and money, as a result. A business needs money in order to grow (and you need it to, if you want to pay your bills). In a networking group, you are there to network, which means you learn about each other and ideally promote and recommend each other to businesses. I say ideally, because it doesn’t always work. To make it work you need the right kind of training on how to network, and most lead organizations don’t do an effective job of teaching networking skills. But the sad truth is some people are scared of sales, of really putting themselves out there, and so networking becomes a safe haven of sorts, because you can talk about yourself without really selling anyone. The benefit is that you can get more comfortable talking about your business and your self (and even get an occasional sale), but the problem is that at some point you’ve got to leave the nest and put yourself out there. And while networking can help you with that, if you only to stick to networking as a marketing and sales tactic, you’ll never sell anything. It was only when I stopped relying on networking groups so much that I became more focused on sales. Lead Referral Groups and Chambers of Commerce work for Product based businesses, but not so much for service based businesses In the years I belonged to lead referral groups, I...

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The potent power of discomfort in your business: How to make it your ally

By on Mar 15, 2016 in Blog, boundaries, business | 0 comments

One of the hardest lessons I had to learn about running my businesses involved learning how to listen to my discomfort and use it to help me make better business decisions. What I didn’t recognize at first is that my discomfort is really a red flag that I’m about to go off course or that I’m compromising myself in some way for short term gain AND long term loss. Learning to listen to my discomfort has helped me turn it into a potent ally that is helping me grow my business in ways I’d previously been unable to do. The ruts you are stuck in, the discomfort you feel, the lack of fulfillment in your life no matter how successful you are…All of that is potent information about how you are blocking yourself from what you truly want. The only way to unleash that potential is to step into your discomfort, your fear, your rut and embrace it…revel in it, and learn from it what the underlying narrative really is that influences your business. Once you know that narrative you can change it, because you are no longer bound to it. You know it by discovering it in the uncomfortable feelings that are present around your business. When you feel your belly knot in anxiety and discomfort over something happening in your business or you feel some type of internal resistance to going to an event or doing an activity, don’t just push it down or ignore it. While in the short term that might work, in the long term, those emotions will boil over and cause your business to burn out. Your discomfort, the feelings of being stuck in a rut, and the internal resistance are all powerful clues that you need to make changes in your business. Instead of pushing those emotions down or ignoring them, you need to be present with them. And being present with such emotions isn’t always easy. You may very well feel paralyzed by the discomfort you feel or panicked. You may want to react to what you are feeling. Don’t react. Still yourself and just sit with what you feel. The emotions will gradually fall away to reveal the underlying narrative...

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