How to recognize when you're sabotaging yourself

Instead of doing Thankful Thursday and Conscious Commitment this week, I thought I would focus on how to recognize when you’re sabotaging yourself. Before I do that, I want to announce that I am now offering freelance editing services on Imagine Your Reality. If you have a book you are working on or a similar project, contact me about editing it.

Also the latest radio show is now available to listen to. Next week I’ll be focusing on the concept of identity and how it is created initially and how we can change our identity.

The reason I’m focusing on how to recognize when you’re sabotaging yourself is because earlier this week I had two people point something out to me that helped me recognize I was sabotaging myself. I’d written an article for this newsletter earlier this week about keeping your spirit up during rough economic times and mentioned I’d been job hunting…I also passed off my current activities as not being very productive. One of my readers pointed this out. The next day I was again describing some of my current activities and one of the people listening also noticed how I phrased my activities and also brought up the same point as my reader had.

Hearing two different people offer the same perspective quickly told me I was sabotaging myself. I wasn’t aware I was sabotaging myself, but they were and their perspectives helped me realize that I needed to tell myself and others a different story than the one I was currently telling. It also helped me realize just how valuable it is to have people who can offer their own awareness on what I’m saying. Of course, it’s not always easy to listen to the perspectives other people have, especially if the perspective offered is one you would rather not listen to. The temptation to ignore the person can be quite high, but that’s another sabotage as well.

Don’t get me wrong…not everyone’s insight is correct and ultimately you, me, and everyone else has to make their own decisions, but learning to listen to people sometimes involves listening to what we’d rather ignore about ourselves. And at that moment a choice has to be made…Will I really listen to this person and consider what has been said, or will I ignore it and potentially continue to sabotage myself. Believe it or not, it is much easier to make the second choice…but we also have to deal with the consequences.

The next time you’re in a situation and someone offers a perspective on what you said or did, take some time to consider what was said. If you find yourself resistant to it, ask yourself: What it is about what I heard that I don’t like and be honest with yourself. By doing this you can sometimes identify something you do that sabotages you, and then make changes. Remember as well that in the end it’s your choice as to whether to change yourself and stay the same.


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Thank you. You are correct. It is hard to recognize that input most if not all the time. I've had to really school myself to be very open with myself in recognizing when I feel stubborn.

Thank you. You are correct. It is hard to recognize that input most if not all the time. I've had to really school myself to be very open with myself in recognizing when I feel stubborn.

Very inspiring. It's rare to recognize input that you disagree with, especially about yourself. It's even more rare to recognize it, analyze it, and build from it. I'd be lying if I said I consider most undesired feedback. Only from someone whom I have ultimate respect for would I do this, maybe. Best regards sir.

Very inspiring. It's rare to recognize input that you disagree with, especially about yourself. It's even more rare to recognize it, analyze it, and build from it. I'd be lying if I said I consider most undesired feedback. Only from someone whom I have ultimate respect for would I do this, maybe. Best regards sir.