Resources are a choice as well
If life coaching is about helping a person recognize that s/he has resources available to hir that weren’t recognized before, I also think that sometimes it’s about recognizing what you are really attached to, resources as it were that others have shown you that aren’t always as useful because they represent the “shoulds”…what other people feel you should be as opposed to who you really want to show up as.
What I’m getting at is that a life coaching relationship involves not just helping a client realize what s/he wants, but also helping a client recognize what s/he does not want in hir life. I use help, because it’s not for the life coach to tell the client what doesn’t work…The client has to figure out what resources aren’t useful, or what patterns of behavior hinder the realization of a success. The coach asks questions, helps the client realize well-formed outcomes and effects that changes will have on the client and other people, but the client, in the end, has to choose to act. The coach can help the client realize steps, even set up an acocuntability structure, but the client has to make the ultimate choice and follow through on what s/he wants to do, but also recognize what s/he does not need to accomplish those goals.
When I show a client a process, and we do the steps in the process, what is really happening is that the client is using the process to identify both the useful and not useful resources and then making a choice about what to do with those resources. Once the client knows what resources to use, then the client can make effective changes.
It’s an important distinction to remember. I’m not ust helping the client access resources, but also providing the client an opportunity to choose the resources that will help hir manifest hir imagination into reality.
